The Comedown

It's inevitable, every time.

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I look so happy, because I hadn’t yet completely lost my voice!

I am back on my Sad Swift BS.

As in, I’m officially in the Boston Marathon Comedown phase, and I’m blasting “All Too Well (Sad Girl Autumn Version)” in the shower, in the car, and on the run.

This past weekend was, in so many ways, perfect.

And in so many ways, it wasn’t.

I’ll be talking more about all of it — all of it — on the podcast next week, once my voice is back just a bit more. I have a lot to say. (Shocking! So shocking, I know!)

But today, a few top-of-mind thoughts I want to share in the wake of Boston 2023.

There were a handful of “I can’t believe this is my life” moments that took place sometime between Thursday night and Tuesday morning. These are the moments I keep going back to, as “Death By a Thousand Cuts” fades to “this is me trying.”

1. Friday morning, when I headed out for a 5-mile run, and quite literally bumped into Eliud Kipchoge’s crew in the hotel lobby. Same place, same time, and, turns out, same running route. I [somewhat awkwardly] ran step-for-step with him and his people for half a mile, until we got down to the Charles, at which point I stopped and let them go so I didn’t seem like a weird hanger-on. It really was a total coincidence, and what a way to kick off the weekend. It was thrilling. I didn’t talk to him, but being in his presence was electrifying.

2. When Keira D’Amato and I walked up to the Glossier store on Newbury Street before the Saturday night live show. We wondered what the crowd was for on the street. There was an impossibly long line, and I wondered if we were approaching a new shoe release, a new video game, or a meet-and-greet with Des Linden. We got closer and realized the line was for us, for our show. The show itself was pure magic. It was the kind of live show I dream of — a mix of fun, games, silliness, audience participation, sparkles, glitter, laughter, and tears. I felt so completely in my element, and so fulfilled.

3. Later that night, walking from the show to dinner with Keira and our friends, Conor and Zach. We walked through the finish line, and there was music blasting, and we had an all-out dance party. (I love that the Boston Marathon keeps the finish line open at all hours — with a DJ! — so people can enjoy it. Other races, take note! People loved it!) We sang “Sweet Caroline” at the top of our lungs (weird that I lost my voice), and I just remember feeling completely content.

4. And then, dinner with friends. I love the hustle, the madness, the excitement of these big race weekends. I’ve also learned that I need the quiet moments in between. This time, that moment came at dinner. I was riding such a high from the show and the finish line dance party, and then got to sit at dinner with five of my favorite people in the whole world. I got to be with my people, eating a tuna poke bowl, and completely embracing the fact that my friends from different places were all becoming friends with each other. That’s a really special thing. I sat there and took it all in.

5. Jenny. Jenny Simpson is magic. She came by my hotel room on Sunday to give me a present (to give me a present? what?!), and ended up staying for two hours while we talked and she braided my hair. I remember sitting on the floor of my hotel, with professional runner Jenny Simpson braiding my hair, thinking, “What is my life? How did I get here?” We — Jenny, me, and my dear friend Jess — had a beautiful conversation about life, about running, and about being “hard to hurt.” That stuck with me. I’m sensitive, I’m easy to upset, I care a lot. How do I keep my core values — integrity, kindness, caring — and live with enough conviction that I’m hard to hurt? Something to think about.

6. Marathon Monday: Big Papi, finish line interviews, and hours of hype. I interviewed David Ortiz, thinking it was just to entertain the crowds at the finish line before the winners started arriving. A few hours later, my phone lit up. Turns out, the interview wasn’t just recorded, it aired on ESPN. Me, on ESPN, interviewing a baseball Hall of Famer. I interviewed the four race winners — Marcel Hug, Susannah Scaroni, Evans Chebet, and Hellen Obiri — live for the world feed race broadcast, with a viewership of 800 million people. And unlike last year, when I was nervous, unsure, shaky, and totally terrified, this time felt better. I felt like, dare I say, I did a good job? I got to hug so many friends at the finish line, I cried, and I brought as much hype as I could until my voice completed dissolved. Last year, I left Boston feeling like I did my best. This year, I feel like I did well enough to get invited back. I rarely feel that. The confidence is coming.

Keira’s mom gave me a Meat Thing shirt. Life = complete.

Of course, in the immediate aftermath of the race, I started learning about the less-great parts of the day, which I’ll talk more about in next week’s recap episode.

Namely:

Mile 21. This story is so disheartening, and so upsetting, and the conversations around it have been both enlightening (I’ve learned a lot) and enraging. In short: This cheer station was over-policed in a way that non-BIPOC cheer stations would never be. I don’t think this is about whether they were using confetti canons or bypassing the barrier to be on the course. People do that at every cheer station at every race. This is about racism. And while, yes, I work for the Boston Athletic Association (as a contractor), and I love the people there, and I love the organization, I feel frustrated that it took three days for us to hear from them about what happened. I feel frustrated that the statement we did get lacks substance, lacks accountability, and lacks clear steps forward. I’m hoping that the Pioneers Run Crew and the TrailblazHers Run Co. were heard by the B.A.A. in their meeting on Wednesday evening. Is this a running community problem? A police problem? Both? I’ve been doing much more listening and reading on this one than talking — and that has frustrated some people, I understand. I’m trying to have conversations where they can matter most, and for me, that means with my employers, with my colleagues, and with the running organizations I work with, to ensure this doesn’t happen in the future. More to come.

There were a few other lows: runners not receiving medals at the finish line (it’s my understanding that two boxes of medals went missing at some point in the day, which totally sucks, and I totally empathize with the runners’ frustration and sadness, but also, don’t let that ruin your experience! you ran a marathon, and you’re amazing!), everyone talking about the viral poop story (this is my nightmare — not just having to make an emergency stop in a less-than-ideal place, but someone filming it and posting it for the world to see), and the sound guy who had one job at the Keira show and failed to do it (i.e. we have no recording of the show, and I am a bit devastated).

I’d love to say I’m just focusing on the good, but I’m spending a lot of time with both. “Feeling all the feelings,” if you will.

Just looking at my personal Boston 2023 experience, this was one of the best weekends of my life. I felt like I hit my stride, like I was where I was meant to be, like I was thriving.

Is there room for me to learn, grow, improve? Oh my goodness, yes, in so many ways.

And? I’m darn proud of getting there, and of doing some of the fun stuff I got to do. I would re-live it all a million times over.

(Reminder: It’s all because I sent the email last year.)

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This edition of the Ali on the Run newsletter is presented by Bandit.

Bandit is a Brooklyn-based performance and lifestyle running apparel brand that makes head-to-toe women’s and men’s running products, hosts experiences (from pop-ups to unsanctioned street races!), and is putting out some super creative and original content (check out their newsletter, podcast, and Instagram @banditrunning).

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This week on the Ali on the Run Show:

• LIVE from the Boston Marathon with Aliphine Tuliamuk, Sara Hall, & Sara Vaughn: On motherhood, marathons, and so much more. Delightfully unedited and unfiltered!

• Run Your Way with Emma Bates: BATES! What a run this woman had in Boston! Fifth overall, first American woman, and a significant personal best. We recapped it all.

What I’m watching: The Love is Blind Season 4 final episodes and reunion. It’s so bad. The reunion was painful. Someone replace the Lacheys ASAP, please. (Give us what we want: Season 1’s Lauren and Cameron as hosts!) I have so much to say about Vanessa’s hosting, her probing, her questions, the way she treats the men, the way she always lets the women off the hook. Weirdly, I…don’t loathe Zack anymore? And he and Bliss…seem happy? What is happening in this world?!

On the run: I’m officially in the taper! I ran 16 miles in Boston on Sunday, and it was amazing. Turns out, 16 miles absolutely flies by when you’re running along the Charles during marathon weekend, bumping into friends every few seconds. It was so nice having company, especially during my “fast finish” miles. (Thanks, Jay and Ellen!) Thanks, also, to everyone who said hi on the run. Sorry I didn’t stop for hugs and selfies — I was getting it done out there! I’ll do 13 miles this weekend, and then it’s the big one. Not ready to think about that, though! Not yet. (But…!!!)

And so…

Take good care of yourselves. Take good care of each other. Be kind. Never forget that you’ve got this! Thank you so much for being here. And whatever you’re going through, keep going.

Love,

Ali